Top 10 Reasons Someone Would...

... Put a Scarf in a Toaster:
10. To warm it up because they don't want to toss it in the dryer
9. To see what would happen.
8. Because they thought it would be fun to take an early morning fieldtrip out in the snow to wait for the fire department.
7. To hide it somewhere no one would think to look.

You know what, I can't think of six more reasons. Hell, even those are pathetic at best, and that's being kind.

Thanks to some shmuck who for one of the above reasons, or something entirely different that in their moronic brain resembled logic, decided to put a scarf in the toaster.... a SCARF in the TOASTER... our kitchen's locked and I can't make any of the food I bought over the weekend and I can't make my tea.

Did I mention I fucking hate it here this semester?